The limitations of our options, cognitive awareness, and practical capabilities make defaults in decisions, responses, and actions almost necessary. Sometimes we simply do not have the time or information required to do otherwise.
But when defaultness becomes all they are — where actions become reflexes and “oh, that’s nice” is but a hollow exhaled reaction – words and actions cease to have substance. Once that point is crossed, it soon loses meaning. It is but a matter of time before it loses its function altogether.
How many smiles, nods, and “how are you’s” are given and received without heart, mind, and will?
The quickness and ease by which we allow things to become defaults — the new normals, so to speak — bothers me.
It is almost as if, when a “hello” is spoken with intention and deliberation, there must be some weird or specific reason for such special attention.
But that awareness, that deliberation is exactly what salvages that which needs to be done from the abyss of defaultism, and keeps it within the realm of meaningful exchanges and substantial action.
This is one reason I tend to overthink, I think. I need to know I mean the things I think or say or do, or else I feel I am losing my grip on my self-respect, or a clear relationship with reality, or myself. Maybe all three.
Maybe this tidbit is worth the mental gymnastics, though. If the path to making and keeping things default is a slippery slope, it is better not to budge even the first inch.
Live with seriousness, if you must.
Live as if life is a game, if you will.
But for the sake of your soul, live not by default.