Lately there have been voices speaking into my life, commenting on how I’m living my life, whether I’m being social enough, whether I’m truly an “independent adult”, how I could be so unrealistic, why I’m still behind on life–whatever that means.
- I haven’t traveled much.
- I don’t have a full-time job.
- I’m not dating, engaged, or married. I haven’t been to a “real” college or university.
- I’ve never lived on my own for over a week.
- I still live at home.
- I don’t have social media, or a big group of friends to hang out with regularly.
And on and on the list goes.
Such voices have raised questions in my heart and mind on just how I see where I am in life. Do I have all the answers now? No–but I have all the ones that I need to proceed past the doubts with a smile.
So let this piece serve as an answer to the above concerns. At least for the time being.
- I’m in my early twenties, making enough to live on working 10 hours a week doing what I love. There’s always extra, both in cash and in time–which often end up being re-invested into other income streams or projects.
- I live with 8 of the people in the entire world who love me, and who matter most to me, sharing life, learning, and laughter with them on an hourly basis. I never have to come home after a long day of work or classes to a cold, dark, and silent room. I learn to live in community while having the freedom to create for hours on end without worrying over the every last detail of daily life.
- I’m surrounded by trees and farms, but live just 15-30 mins away from several thriving towns and cities. Bubble tea shops and trails are both within spontaneous-planning distance.
- My days are spent actualizing dreams and ideas, learning different skills, building projects and knowledge, doing what makes me alive. Which often has the effect of sparking even more ideas, energy, and experiments before I’m able to complete anything–a virtuous cycle that gets masochistic quickly, I’d admit.
- I have more friends than I could count on one hand that I truly connect with and know who care for me deeply, and opportunities to pour into many others.
Need I go on? It sounds quite ideal, no?
I’m not just talking about work-life balance here, either. It’s life design that nurtures life, lived in such a way that it deepens, broadens, and gives of itself without losing itself. My life gets even better the deeper you look into the rest of the picture (offline, my apologies). And I’m just getting started.
No, my life is not perfect, and in many ways it could seem as if I haven’t succeeded or made much progress with it as I could have.
But I’d like to leave you with two thoughts:
First: When you play the game of comparison, you submit yourself to someone else’s rules. Not only does that force you into living your own life as an NPC—those rules might not be valid to begin with. Life isn’t something to be treated like that.
Second: At the risk of ending this post on an absurdly cliché note, how your life turns out is truly a matter of choice. Your choice. You can design your life. Period.
I’m living this reality–and oh, how vibrant and joyous it is!